emselves instruments to an
excessive degree ponderous and grotesque, probably eliminating entirely
from the field such dangerously-located officers as "Le Long-stoppe,"
"Le square-legge," and, above all, "Le wicket-keepere," but this does
not affect their action in considering the reformation of the rules for
the legitimate and reasonable conduct of the game of "Kicke-ball." No,
_mon cher Monsieur_, these they are agreeable to leave as they are,
remembering that the ball, formidable though he may be on account of his
size, is harmless as a butterfly in the contact, being filled only with
air. Moreover they see no reason to change when an "_Onze_" of this New
Athletic France can, with the old rules, claim as she does the noble
victory of _le deux_ "tries" to nothing, and enables the writer of this
letter of correction, with a satisfaction that is keen and infinite, and
a pride that is profound and pardonable, to subscribe himself hereunder,

A THREE-QUARTERRE-BACK OF THE RECENTLY VICTORIOUS LYCEE.

* * * * *

QUESTION OF PARENTAGE.--Prof. HUXLEY, returning to the charge against
Socialism, declares Capital to be "the Mother of Labour". If so, surely
"the child was mother of the--woman!"--to adopt WORDSWORTH'S seeming
paradox. The first family, when first doomed to Labour, had surely very
little Capital.

When ADAM delved and EVE span
Where was then the--"Middleman"?

* * * * *

A City Correspondent sends us this Advertisement from the _Daily
Chronicle_:--

The MANAGERS of the STOCK EXCHANGE are about to APPOINT an ASSISTANT
SUPERINTENDENT of WAITERS. Applications, accompanied by
Testimonials, must be made in writing, on or before the 15th March,
to the Secretary, the Stock Exchange, from whom full particulars of
the duties and salary can be obtained. Candidates must be under 40
years of age.

He is afraid lest it should have escaped our ROBERT'S eye. Under forty
years of age is rather young for a Superintendent, perhaps; but no doubt
ROBERT, who, as he says, "is not for any pertikler age, but for all
time," would be equal to the occasion.

* * * * *

[Illustration: A HOUSE OF CIPHERS.

[Mr. PICTON, M.P., said, "that if every day was to be taken for
Government business, Private Members would become mere Ciphers."]]

* * * * *

OMNIBUSINESS.

(_A Repor