his
wife. And there's the slangy girl I fell in love with. Nice lot they
are!" (_To Managing Wife._) "Madam, there is nothing, so grand as the
majesty of trade. Your rank and blood are all gammon. We Merchant
Princes are the only people fit to live. However, I'll condescend to
speak to you."

_Managing Wife. (Aside.)_ "How noble! What a gentlemanly person he
really is!" _(To Merchant Prince.)_ "Sir, I bid you welcome. Here is my
daughter, who was just praising your beauty and accomplishments. I leave
you to entertain her." (_Exeunt Baronet, Wife, and Lawyer_.)

_Merchant Prince (placing his chair next to Slangy Daughter's, and
leaning his elbow on her.)_ "There is nothing like trade. We tradesmen
alone are great. We despise the whole lot of clean and idle aristocrats.
I keep a Gin Palace in Liverpool. Does your bloated aristocracy do half
as much for suffering humanity?"

_Slangy Daughter._ "Speak on, speak ever thus, O Noble Being! It's
awfully jolly!"

_Curtain falls, and Baker wakes up to lead his orchestra through the
mazes of "Shoo Fly."_

_Appreciative Lady._ "Isn't it nice? Miss HENRIQUES'S dress is perfectly
beautiful, and it sounds so cunning to hear her talk slang."

_Second Appreciative Lady._ "How handsome ROCKWELL looks! Just like a
real baronet, my dear!"

_Other Appreciative Ladies._ "The dresses at WALLACK'S are always
perfectly exquisite. I mean to have my next dress made with a green silk
fichu, a moire antique bertha, and little point lace peplums and
gussets, just like Miss MESTAYER'S. Won't it be sweet?"

_All the Counter-Jumpers in the Theatre._ "JIM WALLACK'S the boy! Don't
he talk up to those aristocratic snobs, though?"

_Act 2. Enter Unpleasant Neighbor and Unintelligible German. The former
says,_ "You're sure there's an iron mine on the Baronet's land?"

_Unintelligible German._ "Ya! Das ist um-um-um."

_Enter Merchant Prince and Slangy Daughter. Exeunt the other fellows._

_Merchant Prince._ "There is nothing like the grandeur of trade; and yet
we tradesmen are not proud. See! I offer to marry you."

_Slangy daughter._ "I love you wildly! _(Aside.)_ I do hope he won't
rumple my hair."

_Merchant Prince._ "Come to my arrums! The majesty of trade is so
infinitely above any thing else"--_and so forth._

_Enter Managing Wife._ "Take her, noble Merchant, and be happy
_(Aside.)_ This settles the affair of the mortgage." _(To Daughter)_
"Come, darling, we'll go and tell your