e formulas of
the Church in which he had been reared, he knew not how to condemn
that longing after the Word of God which was generally the first
step towards the dreaded sin of heresy.

No one more sincerely abhorred the name and the sin of heresy. When
men denied the presence of the living God in the sacraments of the
Church, or attacked its time-honoured practices in which the heart
of the young monk was bound up, then the whole soul of the
enthusiast rose up in revolt, and he felt that such blasphemers
well deserved the fiery doom they brought upon themselves. But when
their sin was possessing a copy of the living Word; when all that
could be alleged against them was that they met together to read that
Word which was denied to them by their lawful pastors and teachers,
and which they had no opportunity of hearing otherwise--then indeed
did it seem a hard thing that they should be so mercilessly condemned
and persecuted.

Yet he could not deny that this reading and expounding of the
Scriptures by the ignorant and unlearned led almost invariably to
those other sins of blasphemy and irreverence which curdled the
very blood in his veins. Again and again had his heart burned
within him to go forth amongst the people himself; to take upon
himself and put in practice the office of evangelist, which he knew
to be a God-appointed ministry, and yet which was so seldom
worthily fulfilled, and himself to proclaim aloud the gospel, that
all might have news of the Son of God, yet might be taught to
reverence the holy sacraments more rather than less for the sake of
Him who established them upon earth, and to respect the priesthood,
even though it might in its members show itself unworthy, because
it was a thing given by Christ for the edification of the body, and
because He Himself, the High Priest passed into the heavens, must
needs have His subordinate priests working with Him and by Him on
earth.

Again and again had longings such as these filled his soul, and he
had implored leave to go forth preaching and teaching. But he had
never won permission to do this. The request had been treated with
contempt, and he himself had been suspected of ambition and other
unworthy motives. He had submitted to the will of his superiors, as
his vow of obedience obliged him to do; but none the less did his
heart burn within him as he saw more and more plainly how men were
thirsting for living waters, and realized with ever-increasing
int