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Published by HARPER & BROTHERS, New York

_For sale by all booksellers, or will be mailed by the
publishers, postage prepaid, on receipt of the price._

[Illustration: TWO AMBITIOUS CUBS.]

AN EXPLANATION.

MAMMA. "Willie, how did that candle-grease come to get all over your
bureau?"

WILLIE. "I suppose, mamma, it was because it couldn't get into the wick
to burn up."

BOBBY'S TROUBLE.

I'm generally contenter
Than any boy I know,
I'm satisfied most always
Whate'er may come or go.
But this time I'm dissatisfied,
A most peculiar biz!
There's something that I want to do,
But I don't know what it is.

PHRENOLOGIST. "I see that you have a good many lumps on your head; they
all mean something."

CHARLIE. "I guess they do. The larger one is where Fred Mason struck me
with a bat; the one next to it I got from falling down the stairs."

MOTHER. "Jack, what are you going to do with the screw-driver?"

JACK. "I'm going to fasten the screw which Willie Mason said I had loose
this morning."

THE STEAMBOAT.

The steamboat is a wagon;
On wheels it runs its course.
The machinery's the harness,
The engine is the horse.

AN EXTRAORDINARY HAPPENING.

"I saw my papa's last book before he wrote it," said Jimmieboy.

"How did that happen?" asked the visitor.

"It was a blank-book then," said Jimmieboy.

BOBBY (_on ferry-boat_). "I know why the river is so angry to-day."

JACK. "Why?"

BOBBY. "Because it is crossed so often."

UNCLE JOHN. "Jimmie, if I were to take one dollar and divide it into
four parts, and give a quarter to each of your brothers, what would be
left?"

JIMMIE. "I would."

LOOKING ON THE BRIGHT SIDE.

MAMMA. "You must take this medicine like a good boy, Tommy; it is spring
medicine."

TOMMY. "All right, mamma, if it will only make the spring come, so's I
can play ball."

An old gentleman, within a short distance of the grave, remarked to his
coachman, "Alas, James, I shall shortly go on a longer journey than you
have ever driven me."

JAMES (_who had often been berated for reckless driving_). "Rest easy,
master, for it's a journey down hill all the way."

"I don't know why it is, Charlie, but you are always quarrelling. I dare
say you quarrel with yourself."

"Can't help it; every one does that has a nose and chin."

"Why, how do yo