of man. These cruel men are ill-natured husbands. The commerce in
the conjugal state is so delicate, that it is impossible to prescribe
rules for the conduct of it, so as to fit ten thousand nameless
pleasures and disquietudes which arise to people in that condition. But
it is in this as in some other nice cases, where touching upon the
malady tenderly, is half way to the cure; and there are some faults
which need only to be observed to be amended. I am put into this way of
thinking by a late conversation which I am going to give an account of.

I made a visit the other day to a family for which I have a great
honour, and found the father, the mother, and two or three of the
younger children, drop off designedly to leave me alone with the eldest
daughter, who was but a visitant there as well as myself, and is the
wife of a gentleman of a very fair character in the world. As soon as we
were alone, I saw her eyes full of tears, and methought she had much to
say to me, for which she wanted encouragement. "Madam," said I, "you
know I wish you all as well as any friend you have: speak freely what I
see you are oppressed with, and you may be sure, if I cannot relieve
your distress, you may at least reap so much present advantage, as
safely to give yourself the ease of uttering it." She immediately
assumed the most becoming composure of countenance, and spoke as
follows: "It is an aggravation of affliction in a married life, that
there is a sort of guilt in communicating it: for which reason it is,
that a lady of your and my acquaintance, instead of speaking to you
herself, desired me the next time I saw you, as you are a professed
friend to our sex, to turn your thoughts upon the reciprocal
complaisance which is the duty of a married state.

"My friend was neither in fortune, birth nor education, below the
gentleman whom she has married. Her person, her age, and her character,
are also such as he can make no exception to. But so it is, that from
the moment the marriage ceremony was over, the obsequiousness of a lover
was turned into the haughtiness of a master. All the kind endeavours
which she uses to please him, are at best but so many instances of her
duty. This insolence takes away that secret satisfaction, which does not
only excite to virtue, but also rewards it. It abates the fire of a free
and generous love, and embitters all the pleasures of a social life."
The young lady spoke all this with such an air of resentment