o person of that name. Well, what does the fellow do, but come
running to my bedside, a little ago, and tells me that there _had been_
a Mr. Smith in the house over night, and that he was at that moment on
the top of the ---- coach. Well, my dear sir, did not I immediately and
very naturally conclude that this Mr. Smith must be my brother! And thus
has this unlucky mistake happened. 'Pon my honour, I am most sorry for
it--exceedingly sorry, indeed."

Bein naturally o' a very placable disposition, I didna say much in reply
to this harangue; but, mutterin something aboot there bein nae help
for't, rushed oot o' the hoose, an' down the confounded lang close, as
fast as my legs could carry me, and that was pretty fast; but no fast
aneuch to catch the coach. It was aff an' awa, mony a lang minute afore.

"Aweel," said I, on discoverin this, "but this does beat cock-fechtin!
What, in heaven's name, am I to do wi' this unfortunate patronymic o'
mine? It's crossin me wi' mischief o' ae kind or anither at every step.
I suppose I'll be hanged in a mistake next. That'll be the end o't. I'll
change't, if I leeve to get hame--I'll change't, let what like be the
consequence, or I'll hae an _alias_ added till't, before waur comes o't;
for this'll never do."

In such reflections as thae did I expend the impatient feelin that the
loss o' the coach, an' the recollection o' certain ither sma' incidents,
with which the reader is acquainted, had gien rise to. But little guid
they did me; an' this I at length fand oot. Sae I just gied a bit smile
to mysel, an' made up my mind to wait patiently for the next coach,
which started the same nicht, though at a pretty late hour. Late as that
hour was, however, it cam roun, an', whan it did, it fand me, withoot
havin met wi' ony ither misfortune in the interim, mounted again on the
tap o' a coach. This time I was allowed to keep my seat in peace. The
coach drove awa, an' me alang wi't; an', in twal hours thereafter, I
fand mysel in my faither's hoose, safe and soun', after a' that had
happened me.

Shortly after the occurrences which I have just related, my puir faither
departed this life, and I, as his only son and heir, succeeded to a' his
possessions--stock, lock, and barrel; and I now only wanted a wife to
complete my establishment, and fix my position in society. This,
however, didna remain lang a desideratum wi' me. A wife I got, and as
guid a ane as ever man was blessed wi'; but it was rat