d, a woman may be thoroughly agreeable even to her own
sex, if her eagerness to please is accompanied by genuine kindliness, or
is free from excessive selfishness. It may be easy enough to see that
all her little courtesies and attentions are at bottom really
attributable to vanity; that, when she does a kind act, she is thinking
less of its effect upon your comfort and happiness than of its effect
upon your estimate of her character. She would perhaps rather you got
half the advantage with her aid than the whole advantage without it. Her
motive is, primarily, vanity--clearly not kindness--however amicably
they may in general work together. But still it is the kindness that
makes the vanity flow into pleasant, friendly forms. In a selfish woman
the very same vanity would degenerate into posturing or dressing. And,
odd as it may seem, and as much as it may reflect upon the common sense
of poor humanity, we believe that kind acts done out of genuine,
unadulterated benevolence are less appreciated by the recipient than
kind acts done out of benevolence stimulated by vanity. The latter are
pleasant because they spring out of the desire to please, and soothe our
self-love, whereas the former appeal to our self-interest.

There are few things in this world more charming than the kindly
courtesy of a pretty woman, not ungracefully conscious of her power to
please, and showing courtesy because she enjoys the exercise of this
power. Strictly speaking, she is acting less in your interest than in
her own. Although she feels at once the pleasure of pleasing and the
pleasure of doing a kindly action, the second is quite subordinate to
the first, and is perhaps, more or less, sacrificed to it. Yet who is
strong-minded enough to wish that the kindliness of a pretty woman
should be dictated by simple benevolence, untinged by vanity? If we knew
that her kindliness arose rather from a wish to benefit us than to
conciliate our good opinion, it is perhaps possible that we should
esteem her more, but we fear it is quite certain that we should like her
less.

Before we conclude, we ought perhaps to make one more postulate on
behalf of female vanity, not less important than our postulate that it
should be pleasantly tinged by unselfishness. To be agreeable, it must
have fair foundation. A woman may be forgiven for over-estimating her
charms, but there is no forgiveness on this side of the grave for a
woman who recklessly credits herself with