Mr. Brown wants
a paper, and has commissioned Thigh to buy him one. Thigh wants me to
sell a half share in the _Pilgrim_ for a thousand, but I shall have
to give Thigh back four hundred; and I shall--that is to say, I shall
if I agree to Thigh's terms--become assistant editor at a salary of
six pounds a week; two pounds a week of which I shall have to hand
over to Thigh, who comes in as editor at a salary of ten pounds a
week. All the staff will be engaged on similar conditions. Thigh is
'working' Beacham Brown beautifully--he won't have a sixpence to
bless himself with when Thigh has done with him."

"And are you going to accept Thigh's terms?"

"Not if I can possibly help it. If your articles send up the
circulation and my new advertising agent can do the West End
tradesmen for a few more advertisements, I shall stand off and wait
for better terms. My new advertising agent is a wonder, the finest in
Christendom. The other day a Bond Street jeweller who advertises with
us came into my office. He said, 'Sir, I have come to ask you if you
circulate thirty thousand copies a week.' 'Well,' I said, 'perhaps
not quite.' 'Then, sir,' he replied, 'you will please return me my
money; I gave your agent my advertisement upon his implicit assurance
that you circulated thirty thousand a week.' I said there must be
some mistake; Mr. Tomlinson happens to be in the office, if you'll
allow me I'll ask him to step down-stairs. I touched the bell, and
told the boy to ask Mr. Tomlinson to step into the office. 'Mr.
Tomlinson,' I said, 'Mr. Page says that he gave you his advertisement
on our implicit assurance that we circulated thirty thousand copies
weekly. Did you tell him that?' Quite unabashed, Tomlinson answered,
'I told Mr. Page that we had more than thirty thousand readers a
week. We send to ten line regiments and five cavalry regiments--each
regiment consists of, let us say, eight hundred. We send to every
club in London, and each club has on an average a thousand members.
Why, sir,' exclaimed Tomlinson, turning angrily on the jeweller, 'I
might have said that we had a hundred thousand readers and I should
have still been under the mark!' The jeweller paid for his
advertisement and went away crestfallen. Such a man as Tomlinson is
the very bone and muscle of a society journal."

"And the nerves too," said Mike.

"Better than the contributors who want to write about the relation
between art and morals."

The young men laughe