tself as that God
was really seeking after her.

She went on, still falling behind, and trying to hide the rush of
feeling that the simple question had called forth. She was very quiet
at the dinner table; she was oblivious to steel forks or the want of
spoons; these things that had hitherto filled her life and looked of
importance to her had strangely dwindled; she was miserably
disappointed; she had looked forward to Chautauqua as a place where she
could have such a "nice" time. That word "nice" was a favorite with her,
and surely no one could be having a more wretched time than this; and it
was not the rain, either, over which she had been miserable all day
yesterday, nor her cashmere dress; she didn't care in the least now
whether it cleared or not; and as to her dress, she had torn her silk
twice, and it was sadly drabbled, but she did not even care for that;
she wanted--what? Alas for the daughter of nominally Christian parents,
living among all the privileges of a cultured Christian society, she
_did not know what the wanted_.

Dr. Calkins had one eager listener. If he could have picked out her
earnest, wistful eyes among that crowd of upturned faces he would have
let old Socrates go, and given himself heart and soul to the leading of
this groping soul into the light. As it was he hovered around it,
touching the subject here and there, thrilling her with the
possibilities stretching out before her; but he was thinking of and
talking all the while to those who had reached after and secured this
"something" that to her was still a shadow. Now and then the speaker
brought the quick tears to her eyes as he referred to those who had
followed the teaching of his lips with sympathetic faces and answered
the appeal to their hearts with tears; but her tears were different from
those--they were the tears of a sick soul, longing for light and help.

The entire party ignored the evening meeting. Marion declared that her
brain whirled now, so great had been the mental strain; Ruth was loftily
indifferent to any plan that could be gotten up, and Eurie's wits were
ripe for mischief; Flossy's opinion, of course, was not asked, nobody
deeming it possible that she could have the slightest desire to go to
meeting. In fact, Eurie put their desertion on the ground that Flossy
had been exhausted by the mental effort of the day, and needed to be
cheered and petted. She on her part was silent and wearily indifferent;
she did not know