he only thing higher than your game being your bill, and the
only thing less drinkable than your port being the porter.

With such exotic notions, figures vous, my dear reader, whether or not I
felt happy as I found myself seated between my two fair friends doing the
honours of a little supper, and assisting the exhilaration of our
champagne by such efforts of wit as, under favourable circumstances like
these, are ever successful--and which, being like the foaming liquid
which washes them down, to be swallowed without waiting, are ever
esteemed good, from the excitement that results, and never seriously
canvassed for any more sterling merit. Nothing ever makes a man so
agreeable as the belief that he is so: and certainly my fair companions
appeared to have the most excellent idea of my powers in that respect;
and I fancy, that I made more bon mots, hit off more epigrams, and
invented more choice incidents on that happy evening, than, if now
remembered, would suffice to pay my tailor's bill, when collated for
Bentley's Miscellany, and illustrated by Cruikshank--alas! that, like the
good liquor that seasoned them, both are gone by, and I am left but to
chronicle their memory of the fun, in dulness, and counterfeit the
effervescence of the grape juice, by soda water. One thing, however, is
certain--we formed a most agreeable party; and if a feeling of gloom ever
momentarily shot through my mind, it was, that evenings like these came
so rarely in this work-a-day world--that each such should be looked on,
as our last.

If I had not already shown myself up to my reader as a garcon volage of
the first water, perhaps I should now hesitate about confessing that I
half regretted the short space during which it should be my privilege to
act as the guide and mentor of my two friends. The impetuous haste which
I before felt necessary to exercise in reaching Paris immediately, was
not tempered by prudent thoughts about travelling at night, and
reflections about sun-stroke by day; and even moments most devoted to the
object of my heart's aspirations were fettered by the very philosophic
idea, that it could never detract from the pleasure of the happiness that
awaited me, if I travelled on the primrose path to its attainment. I
argued thus: if Lady Jane be true--if--if, in a word, I am destined to
have any success in the Callonby family, then will a day or two more not
risk it. My present friends I shall, of course, take leave of