nant.

"Mr. Small," stammered Mr. Rogers, "I'm sorry you feel bad about not
buying them dishes. I--I thought I'd ought to tell you--that is to say,
I--Well, if you want another set, I cal'late I can get it for you--that
is, if you won't tell nobody."

"ANOTHER set?" hollers Eddie, wide-eyed. "Anoth--Do you mean to say
you've got MORE?"

"Why, I ain't exactly got 'em now, but my nephew John keeps a furniture
store in South Boston, and he has lots of sets like that. I bought that
one off him."

Peter T. Brown jumps to his feet.

"Why, you outrageous robber!" he hollers. "Didn't you say those dishes
were old?"

"I never said nothing, except that they were like the plate that feller
had on the piazza. And they was, too. YOU folks said they was old, and I
thought you'd ought to know, so--"

Eddie Small threw up both hands. "Fakes!" he hollers. "Fakes! AND
THOMPSON PAID ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY-THREE DOLLARS FOR 'EM! Boys,
there's times when life's worth living. Have a drink."

We went into the billard-room and took something; that is, Peter and
Eddie took that kind of something. Me and Jonadab took cigars.

"Fellers," said Eddie, "drink hearty. I'm going in to tell my wife. Fake
dishes! And I beat Thompson on the davenport."

He went away bubbling like a biling spring. After he was gone Rogers
looked thoughtful.

"That's funny, too, ain't it?" he says.

"What's funny?" we asked.

"Why, about that sofy he calls a davenport. You see, I bought that off
John, too," says Adoniram.

HIS NATIVE HEATH

I never could quite understand why the folks at Wellmouth made me
selectman. I s'pose likely 'twas on account of Jonadab and me and Peter
Brown making such a go of the Old Home House and turning Wellmouth Port
from a sand fleas' paradise into a hospital where city folks could
have their bank accounts amputated and not suffer more'n was necessary.
Anyway, I was elected unanimous at town meeting, and Peter was mighty
anxious for me to take the job.

"Barzilla," says Peter, "I jedge that a selectman is a sort of dwarf
alderman. Now, I've had friends who've been aldermen, and they say
it's a sure thing, like shaking with your own dice. If you're straight,
there's the honor and the advertisement; if you're crooked, there's the
graft. Either way the house wins. Go in, and glory be with you."

So I finally agreed to serve, and the very first meeting I went to,
the question of Asaph Blueworthy and the poorhouse