Goodness gracious, my boy! when I heard your English shout, it
went to my marrow. Could they expect me to look down on my own flesh
and blood, on my son--my son Richmond--after a separation of years, and
continue a statue? Nay, I followed my paternal impulse. Grant that the
show was spoilt, does the Markgrafin insist on my having a bronze heart
to carry on her pastime? Why, naturally, I deplore a failure, let the
cause be what it will. Whose regrets can eclipse those of the principal
actor? Quotha! as our old Plays have it. Regrets? Did I not for fifteen
minutes and more of mortal time sit in view of a multitude, motionless,
I ask you, like a chiselled block of stone,--and the compact was one
quarter of an hour, and no farther? That was my stipulation. I told
her--I can hold out one quarter of an hour: I pledged myself to it.
Who, then, is to blame? I was exposed to view twenty-three minutes, odd
seconds. Is there not some ancient story of a monstrous wretch baked in
his own bull? My situation was as bad. If I recollect aright, he could
roar; no such relief was allowed to me. And I give you my word, Richie,
lads both, that while that most infernal Count Fretzel was pouring
forth his execrable humdrum, I positively envied the privilege of an old
palsied fellow, chief boatman of the forest lake, for, thinks I, hang
him! he can nod his head and I can not. Let me assure you, twenty
minutes of an ordeal like that,--one posture, mind you, no raising
of your eyelids, taking your breath mechanically, and your heart
beating--jumping like an enraged balletdancer boxed in your bosom--a
literal description, upon my honour; and not only jumping, jumping
every now and then, I may say, with a toe in your throat: I was
half-choked:--well, I say, twenty minutes, twenty-seven minutes and
a half of that, getting on, in fact, to half-an-hour, it is
superhuman!--by heavens, it is heroical!

And observe my reward: I have a son--my only one. I have been divided
from him for years; I am establishing his fortune; I know he is provided
with comforts: Richie, you remember the woman Waddy? A faithful soul!
She obtained my consent at last--previously I had objections; in fact,
your address was withheld from the woman--to call at your school. She
saw Rippenger, a girl of considerable attractions. She heard you were
located at Riversley: I say, I know the boy is comfortably provided for;
but we have been separated since he was a little creature with c