r, the Beau, feeling the lapel delicately with his finger and thumb,
asked in a most pathetic manner, "Bedford, do you call this _thing_ a
coat?"

Somebody told him, among a knot of loungers at White's, "Brummell, your
brother William is in town. Is he not coming here?"--"Yes," was the
reply, "in a day or two; but I have recommended him to walk the _back
streets_ till his new clothes come home."

Practical jokes are essentially vulgar, and apt to be hazardous besides;
two reasons which should have prevented their performance by an
individual whose object was to be the standard of elegance, and whose
object at no time was to expose himself to the rougher remonstrances of
mankind; but the following piece of sportiveness was at least amusing.

Meeting an old _emigre_ marquis at the seat of some noble friend, and
probably finding the Frenchman a bore, he revenged himself by mixing
some finely powdered sugar in his hair-powder. On the old Frenchman's
coming into the breakfast-room next morning, highly powdered as usual,
the flies, attracted by the scent of the sugar, instantly gathered round
him. He had scarcely begun his breakfast, when every fly in the room was
busy on his head. The unfortunate marquis was forced to lay down his
knife and fork, and take out his pocket-handkerchief to repel these
troublesome assailants, but they came thicker and thicker. The victim
now rose from his seat and changed his position; but all was in
vain--the flies followed in fresh clusters. In despair he hurried to the
window; but every fly lingering there was instantly buzzing and
tickling. The marquis, feverish with vexation and surprise, threw up the
window. This unlucky measure produced only a general invasion by all the
host of flies sunning themselves on the lawn. The astonishment and
amusement of the guests were excessive. Brummell alone never smiled. At
last M. le Marquis gave way in agony, and, clapping his hands on his
head, and followed by a cloud of flies, rushed out of the room. The
secret was then divulged, and all was laughter.

"Poodle B--g," so well known in the world of fashion, owed his
_soubriquet_ to Brummell. B--g was fond of letting his hair, which was
light-coloured, curl round his forehead. He was one day driving in his
curricle, with a poodle by his side. The Beau hailed him with--"Ah,
B--g, how do you do?--A _family_ vehicle, I see."

Some of those oddities of expression are almost too well known now for
effect;