"Now, tell me--what did he say? A bargain's a bargain," she laughed as
Lawrence almost ground his teeth.

"Well, he said,--he said, let me see, what did he say?" paltered the
Major. "He said he could not get a girl he loved to have him."

"Oh! did he say _that?_" She was so much interested that she just knew
that Lawrence half stamped his foot.

"Yes, he said just that, and I told him--"

"Well,--what did you say?"

"Oh! I did not bargain to tell what _I_ told _him_. I received payment
only for betraying his confidence. If you drive a bargain I will drive
one also."

Rose declared that he was the greatest old screw she ever knew, but she
paid the price, and waited.

"Well?--"

"'Well?' Of course, I told him 'well.' I gave him the best advice a man
ever received. A lawyer would have charged him five hundred dollars for
it. I'm an oracle on heart-capture."

Rose laughingly declared she would have to consult him herself, and when
the Major told her to consult only her mirror, gave him a courtesy and
wished he would teach some young men of her acquaintance to make such
speeches. The old fellow vowed, however, that they were unteachable;
that he would as soon expect to teach young moles.

IV.

It was not more than a half hour after this when George Washington came
in and found the Major standing before the long mirror, turning around
and holding his coat back from his plump sides so as to obtain a fair
view of his ample dimensions.

"George Washington," said he.

"Suh."

"I'm afraid I'm growing a little too stout."

George Washington walked around and looked at him with the critical gaze
of a butcher appraising a fat ox.

"Oh! nor, suh, you aint, not to say _too_ stout," he finally decided as
the result of this inspection, "you jis gittin' sort o' potely. Hit's
monsus becomin' to you."

"Do you think so?" The Major was manifestly flattered. "I was
apprehensive that I might be growing a trifle fat,"--he turned carefully
around before the mirror,--"and from a fat old man and a scrawny old
woman, Heaven deliver us, George Washington!"

"Nor, suh, you ain' got a ounce too much meat on you," said George,
reassuringly; "how much you weigh, Marse Nat, last time you was on de
stilyards?" he inquired with wily interest.

The Major faced him.

"George Washington, the last time I weighed I tipped the beam at one
hundred and forty-three pounds, and I had the waist of a girl."

He laid his fat hands