lies Johnny Russell,
Who for his place had many a tussel.
Trying one day _the corn_ to cut down,
The motion fail'd, and he was _put_ down.
The benches which he nearly grew to,
The Opposition quickly flew to;
The fact it was so mortifying,
That little Johnny took to dying.

* * * * *

SHALL GREAT OLYMPUS TO A MOLEHILL STOOP?

Some difficulty has arisen as to the production of Knowles's new play at
the Haymarket Theatre. Mr. Charles Kean and Miss Helen Faucit having
objected to hear the play read, "_because their respective parts had not
been previously submitted to them._"--_Sunday Times_.--[We are of opinion
that they were decidedly right. One might as well expect a child to spell
without learning the alphabet, as either of the above persons to
understand Knowles, unless enlightened by a long course of previous
instruction.]

* * * * *

THE LETTER OF INTRODUCTION.

[From a MS. drama called the "COURT OF VICTORIA."

_Scene in Windsor Castle._

[_Her Majesty discovered sitting thoughtfully at an escrutoire._--

_Enter the_ LORD CHAMBERLAIN.]

LORD CHAMBERLAIN.--May it please your Majesty, a letter from the Duke of
Wellington.

THE QUEEN (_opens the letter_.)--Oh! a person for the vacant place of
Premier--show the bearer in, my lord. [_Exit_ LORD CHAMBERLAIN.

THE QUEEN (_muses_).--Sir Robert Peel--I have heard that name before, as
connected with my family. If I remember rightly, he held the situation of
adviser to the crown in the reign of Uncle William, and was discharged for
exacting a large discount on all the state receipts; yet Wellington is
very much interested in his favour.

_Enter the_ LORD CHAMBERLAIN, _who ushers in_ SIR ROBERT, _and then
retires. As he is going_--]

LORD CHAMBERLAIN (_aside_).--If you do get the berth, Sir Robert, I hope
you'll not give me warning. [_Exit_.

SIR ROBERT (_looking demurely_).--Hem!

[_The Queen regards him very attentively._]

THE QUEEN (_aside_).--I don't much like the looks of the fellow--that
affectation of simplicity is evidently intended to conceal the real
cunning of his character. (_Aloud_). You are of course aware of the nature
and the duties of the situation which you solicit?

SIR ROBERT.--Oh, yes, your Majesty; I have filled it before, and liked it
very much.

THE QUEEN.--It's a most responsible post, for upon your conduct much of
the happiness of