of his hand. "Come,
come, gentlemen. You're not the only other humanoid race in the galaxy.
We don't have time to call on every undeveloped race we happen to run
across. Besides, I never did like playing the role of 'the mysterious
alien who appears unannounced from outer space.' Primitives always
require so much explanation."

"Primitives!" exploded the senator. "Why, of all the impudent--"

The senator was quieted by a colleague who placed his hand over the
offended man's mouth.

The presiding officer at the meeting, a General Beemish, arose and
addressed the visitor. "We realize that from your point of view this
planet has not exactly achieved the cultural or technological level of
your, er, homeland--"

"You said a mouthful," agreed Keeter, who was now cleaning his nails
with the pin attached to a United Nations emblem that somebody had
stuck to his tunic earlier in the day.

"Look," said the general, gamely trying again. "We're not quite as
unsophisticated as you seem to think. There are three billion persons
on this planet--persons who are well fed, reasonably well educated,
persons who owe allegiance to only one government. We're making great
strides technologically, too. Within a decade, we'll be established on
the moon--our satellite. Why, even our school children are
space-minded."

"Sure," said Keeter, who had turned in his chair and was now staring
out the window. "Nice little place you got here. Say, is there a
bathroom around this place. I gotta--"

Someone showed the visitor to a bathroom where to everyone's
astonishment he proceeded to remove his clothes and leisurely shower.
The meeting was adjourned for thirty minutes. When he had finished his
shower, he dressed, walked back into the conference room, waved a
cheery good-bye, and before anyone realized what was happening, he had
unlocked the door from the inside and closed it behind him.

For a full thirty seconds, no one said anything. Then suddenly someone
managed to gasp, "My God, what'll we do?"

"There's nothing we can do," said General Beemish. There were tears in
his eyes.

Keeter walked all the way back to the ship. It took him an hour and
forty minutes. Long enough, he hoped, for someone to have scooted ahead
and notified the military personnel guarding the area to keep hands
off.

No one attempted to stop him. He boarded the ship, made himself
something to eat, walked to a stock room and pocketed a defective
transistor from