diers of our regiment, who fed upon them
like crows upon _carrion_, not considering the object of this abuse of
the administration,--namely, _political chicanery_. Some of the men who
had enlisted for nine months, no doubt hoped to escape without getting
into a fight; but, having seen the _elephant_, and partly caught a
glimpse of his gigantic proportions, they were ready to make a
sacrifice of every principle of right and justice rather than to expose
their _precious lives_ again.

Many of these men were those who, at home, were ready to make every
sacrifice, denouncing the rebels in no unmeasured terms, shouldering the
musket with an alacrity worthy of the cause to which they pledged their
"lives and _sacred honor_;" who, after a little experimenting in shot,
shell, and gunpowder, were ready to make any sacrifice, or compromise
with the enemy, that would relieve them, fully illustrating the old
saying that "distance lends enchantment to the view;" also, that
"self-preservation is the first law of nature." I became utterly
disgusted with this class of croakers and grumblers, whom it was
impossible to escape, and who greedily fed upon every thing
discouraging, namely, "the impossibility of conquering the enemy,"
"ruinous state of the finances," "depreciation of paper currency," &c.,
endeavoring to hold an argument upon matters they evidently knew nothing
about. They at this time flattered themselves that a general feeling of
dissatisfaction among the soldiers would go towards putting an end to
the war, and used their influence accordingly, swallowing and
disgorging all things of a discouraging nature, and that with an avidity
which would do credit to a flock of buzzards feeding upon a defunct
mule. Those were trying times; but the same principle which prompted me
to enter the service still upheld me. I had faith to think that, as the
war progressed, partisan feeling would be destroyed, the North would
become more united in purpose, able leaders would be found, and this
rebellion would eventually be crushed.

I was very fortunate in being permitted to enjoy good health thus far. I
had not as yet been reported sick, or been excused from duty on account
of sickness, and by a little care escaped the tender mercies of our
hospital. Sickness at this time, January 19th, began to tell upon the
regiment. Quite a number had died in the hospital within a week. Stephen
Clissold was the first man of our company who had died in the