, being always present at such executions himself,
directing the duration of the punishment, and mitigating the tortures
merely to prolong them. 3. In fact, he valued himself for no quality
more than his unrelenting temper, and inflexible severity, when he
presided at an execution. 4. Upon one occasion, being incensed with
the citizens, he wished that the Roman people had but one neck, that
he might dispatch them at one blow.

5. Such insupportable and capricious cruelties produced many secret
conspiracies against him; but they were for a while deferred upon
account of his intended expedition against the Germans and Britons.

[Sidenote: U.C. 793. A.D. 41]

6. For this purpose he caused numerous levies to be made, and talked
with so much resolution, that it was universally believed he would
conquer all before him. 7. His march perfectly indicated the
inequality of his temper; sometimes it was so rapid that the cohorts
were obliged to leave their standards behind them; at other times it
was so slow, that it more resembled a pompous procession than a
military expedition. 8. In this disposition he would cause himself to
be carried on a litter, on eight men's shoulders, and ordered all the
neighbouring cities to have their streets well swept and watered, that
he might not be annoyed with dust. 9 However, all these mighty
preparations ended in nothing. Instead of conquering Britain, he
merely gave refuge to one of its banished princes; and this he
described, in his letter to the senate, as taking possession of the
whole island. 10. Instead of conquering Germany, he only led his army
to the seashore in Gaul: there, disposing his engines and warlike
machines with great solemnity, and drawing up his men in order of
battle, he went on board his galley, with which coasting along, he
commanded his trumpets to sound, and the signal to be given as if for
an engagement. 11. His men, who had previous orders, immediately fell
to gathering the shells that lay upon the shore into their helmets, as
their spoils of the conquered ocean, worthy of the palace and the
capitol. 12. After this doughty expedition, calling his army together,
like a general after victory, he harangued them in a pompous manner,
and highly extolled their achievements; then, distributing money among
them, and congratulating them upon their riches, he dismissed them,
with orders to be joyful: and, that such exploits should not pass
without a memorial, he ordered a lo