be, I can tell you.'

"When he seed I'd found him out, he larfed like any thing. Guess he
found that was no go, for I warn't born in the woods to be scared by
an owl, that's a fact. Well, the fust time I went to lord's party, I
thought it was another brag agin; I never see nothin' like it. Heavens
and airth, I most jumpt out o' my skin. Where onder the sun, sais I to
myself, did he rake and scrape together such super-superior galls as
these. This party is a kind o' consarvitory, he has got all the raree
plants and sweetest roses in England here, and must have ransacked the
whole country for 'em. Knowin' I was a judge of woman kind, he wants me
to think they are all this way; but it's onpossible. They are only
"shew frigates" arter all; it don't stand to reason, they can't be all
clippers. He can't put the leake into me that way, so it tante no
use tryin'. Well, the next time, I seed jist such another covey of
partridges, same plumage, same step, and same breed. Well done, sais I,
they are intarmed to pull the wool over my eyes, that's a fact, but they
won't find that no easy matter, I know. Guess they must be done now,
they can't show another presarve like them agin in all Britain. What
trouble they do take to brag here, don't they? Well, to make a long
story short; how do you think it eventuated, Squire? Why every party I
went to, had as grand a shew as them, only some on 'em was better, fact
I assure you, it's gospel truth; there ain't a word of a lie in it,
text to the letter. I never see nothin' like it, since I was raised, nor
dreamed nothin' like it, and what's more, I don't think the world has
nothin' like it nother. It beats all natur. It takes the rag off quite.
If that old Turk, Mahomed, had seed these galls, he wouldn't a bragged
about his beautiful ones in paradise so for everlastinly, I know; for
these English heifers would have beat 'em all holler, that's a fact. For
my part, I call myself a judge. I have an eye there ain't no deceivin'.
I have made it a study, and know every pint about a woman, as well as I
do about a hoss; therefore, if I say so, it must be so, and no mistake.
I make all allowances for the gear, and the gettin' up, and the vampin',
and all that sort o' flash; but toggery won't make an ugly gall handsum,
nohow you can fix it. It may lower her ugliness a leetle, but it won't
raise her beauty, if she hante got none. But I warn't a talkin' of
nobility; I was a talkin' of Life in the Country.