ct,
staggering, as I did on my feet. Had I been well enough, I believe I
should have gone to my grandfather, to throw myself on his good-nature;
such was the brain's wise counsel: but I was all nerves and alarms,
insomuch that I interdicted Temple's writing to Janet, lest it should
bring on me letters from my aunt Dorothy, full of advice that could no
longer be followed, well-meant cautions that might as well be addressed
to the mile-posts behind me. Moreover, Janet would be flying on the wind
to me, and I had a craving for soft arms and the look of her eyebrows,
that warned me to keep her off if I intended to act as became a man of
good faith.

Fair weather, sunny green sea-water speckled with yachts shooting and
bounding, and sending me the sharp sense of life there is in dashed-up
fountains of silvery salt-spray, would have quickened my blood sooner but
for this hot-bed of fruitless adventure, tricksy precepts, and wisdom
turned imp, in which my father had again planted me. To pity him seemed a
childish affectation. His praise of my good looks pleased me, for on that
point he was fitted to be a judge, and I was still fancying I had lost
them on the heath. Troops of the satellites of his grand parade
surrounded him. I saw him walk down the pier like one breaking up a
levee. At times he appeared to me a commanding phantasm in the midst of
phantasm figures of great ladies and their lords, whose names he told off
on his return like a drover counting his herd; but within range of his
eye and voice the reality of him grew overpowering. It seduced me, and,
despite reason, I began to feel warm under his compliments. He was like
wine. Gaiety sprang under his feet. Sitting at my window, I thirsted to
see him when he was out of sight, and had touches of the passion of my
boyhood.

I listened credulously, too, as in the old days, when he repeated, 'You
will find I am a magician, and very soon, Richie, mark me.' His manner
hinted that there was a surprise in store. 'You have not been on the
brink of the grave for nothing.' He resembled wine in the other
conditions attached to its rare qualities. Oh for the choice of having
only a little of him, instead of having him on my heart! The unfilial
wish attacked me frequently: he could be, and was, so ravishing to
strangers and light acquaintances. Did by chance a likeness exist between
us? My sick fancy rushed to the Belthams for a denial. There did, of some
sort, I knew; and the tho