brow; hatred and disgust filled her heart. Oh, that she should
ever have placed herself in the power of such a man!
The blow had fallen at last. She stood face to face with her shame and
fear. How could she meet Hugh Fernely? What should she say to him?
How must such a meeting end? It would but anger him the more. He
should not even touch her hand in greeting, she said to herself; and
how would he endure her contempt?
She would not see him. She dared not. How could she find time? Lord
Airlie never left her side. She could not meet Hugh. The web seemed
closing round her, but she would break through it.
She would send him a letter saying she was ill, and begging him to wait
yet a little longer. Despite his firm words, she knew he would not
refuse it if she wrote kindly. Again came the old hope something might
happen in a few days. If not, she must run away; if everything failed
and she could not free herself from him, then she would leave home; in
any case she would not fall into his hands--rather death than that.
More than once she thought of Gaspar's words. He was so true, so
brave--he would have died for her. Ah, if he could but help her, if
she could but call him to her aid! In this, the dark hour of her life
by her own deed she had placed herself beyond the reach of all human
help.
She would write--upon that she was determined; but who would take the
letter? Who could she ask to stand at the shrubbery gate and give to
the stranger a missive from herself? If she asked such a favor from a
servant, she would part with her secret to one who might hold it as a
rod of iron over her. She was too proud for that. There was only one
in the world who could help her, and that was her sister Lillian.
She shrank with unutterable shame from telling her. She remembered how
long ago at Knutsford she had said something that had shocked her
sister, and the scared, startled expression of her face was with her
still. It was a humiliation beyond all words. Yet, if she could
undergo it, there would be comfort in Lillian's sympathy. Lillian
would take the letter, she would see Hugh, and tell him she was ill.
Ill she felt in very truth. Hugh would be pacified for a time if he saw
Lillian. She could think of no other arrangement. That evening she
would tell her sister--there was rest even in the thought.
Long before dinner Lady Helena came in search of Beatrice--it was high
time, she said, that orders s
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