whether she was of a feather
with them, or whether it was by some mischance, or by some such stress
of the elements as drives birds of any feather to flock with birds of
any other. To the end there remained a distracted and forsaken
innocence in her looks. It was imaginable that she had made overtures
to the birds of prey because she had made overtures to every one else;
she was always seeking rather than sought, and her acceptance with
them was as deplorable as her refusal by better birds. Often they were
seen without her, when they had that look of having escaped, which
others wore; but she was not often seen without them.
There is not much walking-weather on a November passage, and she was
seen less with them in the early dark outdoors than in the late light
within, by which she wavered a small form through the haze of their
cigars in the smoking-room, or in the grill-room, where she showed in
faint eclipse through the fumes of the broiling and frying, or
through the vapors of the hot whiskies. The birds of prey were then
heard laughing, but whether at her or with her it must have been
equally sorrowful to learn.
Perhaps they were laughing at the maternal fondness which she had used
for introduction to the general acquaintance lost almost in the moment
of winning it. She seemed not to resent their laughter, though she
seemed not to join in it. The worst of her was the company she kept;
but since no better would allow her to keep it, you could not
confidently say she would not have liked the best company on board. At
the same time you could not have said she would; you could not have
been sure it would not have bored her. Doubtless these results are not
solely the sport of chance; they must be somewhat the event of choice
if not of desert.
For anything you could have sworn, the Mother-Bird would have liked to
be as good as the best. But since it was not possible for her to be
good in the society of the best, she could only be good in that of the
worst. It was to be hoped that the birds of prey were not cruel to
her; that their mockery was never unkind if ever it was mockery. The
cruelty which must come came when they began to be seen less and less
with her, even at the late suppers, through the haze of their cigars
and the smoke of the broiling and frying, and the vapors of the hot
whiskies. Then it was the sharpest pang of all to meet her wandering
up and down the ship's promenades, or leaning on the rail and
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