--because no one has invented a
teaffeinless tea.

[KEN _accepts sandwich and tea and tries to be a sport and make the
party._]

KEN. I wouldn't need Martin to turn me into a Communist. All I'd
have to do would be to knock out the partition in the middle of my
brains and let the left side mingle with the right.

TIPPY. As if your brains weren't muddled enough already!

[MARTIN _bursts in, carrying two Soviet posters. Leaves door
ajar._]

MARTIN. Hey, fellows, see what I've got! [_He hangs one up while
the others are inspecting the first._]

LAURA. It's ugly.

KEN. I like them. Why can't Americans make ugly things look
beautiful?

TIPPY. [_To_ MARTIN.] Sow your seed now, Soviet sower. The powers
of darkness have been fertilizing the ground.

[TIPPY _takes thumb tacks and bottle of red ink and goes to
kitchen._]

KEN. A Soviet poster compared to an American lithograph is like a
Soviet film compared with the stuff they grind out in Hollywood.

MARTIN. By God, you're right.--It's the same in all the arts.

LAURA. [_Hysterically jovial._] 'Fess up, Ken. Who's been taking
you to American movies?

KEN. I still remember some I saw during Hoover's administration.
You don't mean they've changed them?

MARTIN. Only the revolution will change that tripe.

LAURA. Gently, Martin. I just told Tippy I was all ripe to turn
Communist. But let's enter by the Socialist door. I don't like
revolutzia. It's bloody.

[MARTIN _pours himself tea_. KEN _squints at posters,_ LAURA
_munches sandwich and giggles_.] Comrade Martin--bring on your
material dialectics.

[_Before_ MARTIN _has chance to answer_, TIPPY'S _voice sings
stridently, as he comes marching in._]

TIPPY. Belaya armeya chornee barone
Snova gotovyat nam tsarskee trone

[_He is now in. A towel is tied about his head with a
big blotch of red ink over his temple. He carries a
broom as a flagstaff to which a red bandanna handkerchief
is attached as a red flag._]

No ot tigee do bretanskeye morye
Armeya krasnaya vsekh seelnaye.

[_On chorus_, MARTIN'S _better voice cuts in strong. He seizes_
LAURA _by the arm, forcing her to march with_ TIPPY. _And_ KEN,
_beating time with goose step, also sings._]

ALL. Tak poost Zheh krasnaya
Shumayet vlasno
Svoe shtik mozoleestoy rookoy
Es vse dolshnee mwee
Neudersheemo
Ette v poslednee sharkee boy.