"The Rev. ----, minister of ---- U.F. Church, was yesterday
presented with pulpit robes, hassock, hood and cap by his
congregation."--_Scotch Paper_.

* * * * *

"Schools of cokery are being 'snowed' under with
applications,"--_Evening Paper_.

We ourselves call almost every day to ask for more cokery.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Employer_ (_who has given his foreman a ticket for
Pianoforte Recital_). "AND HOW DID YOU ENJOY THE MUSIC LAST NIGHT?"

_Foreman_. "I WAS A BIT DISAPPOINTED, SIR. 'E WASN'T 'ARF AS GOOD AS
MY YOUNG FLORRIE. WHY, 'E PLAYED THERE FOR CLOSE ON TWO HOURS, AND
NEVER ONCE CROSSED 'IS 'ANDS."]

* * * * *

"BOTCHES."

AN APPEAL FOR GOD-PARENTS.

For many years the village of Chailey, in Sussex--famous
topographically for possessing that conical tree which is said
to mark the centre of the county, and for a landmark windmill of
dazzling whiteness--has been famous sociologically for its Heritage
Craft Schools of crippled boys and girls. Among the ameliorative
institutions of this country none has a finer record than these
schools, where ever since 1897 the work of converting helplessness
into helpfulness has been going bravely on. Entering as complete
dependents, the inmates leave fully equipped to earn their living
unassisted, the boys chiefly as carpenters, and the girls as
needlewomen. In some cases the cures effected have been remarkable. In
the late War seven-and-twenty Guild boys fought in the ranks, four of
whom were killed and are now proudly commemorated on the wall of the
School church.

This contribution of fighting men, together with a certain activity in
munition-making, is not, however, Chailey's only share in the War, for
the Government are using its experience for the education of cripples
of a larger growth. The boys have, in short, surrendered their
comfortable old quarters--now transferred to a War Hospital, named,
after the Heritage's chief patron, the Princess Louise Special
Military Surgical Hospital--to companies of maimed soldiers, who are
sent to Chailey to learn how much of usefulness and fun can still
remain when limbs are missing; and, by a charming inspiration, their
teachers in this great lesson are the boys themselves. It is no doubt
encouraging for a soldier who has lost both arms to be told by a
kindly and enthusiastic visitor at his bedside that