e old man gave a sardonic laugh as he clumsily made his way to the
perch and gripped it with quivering toes.

"That is, I don't _think_ he knew," Stet said dubiously.

Tarb reached over and picked a letter off the floor. The Fizbian
characters were clumsy and ill-made, as if someone had formed them with
his feet. Could there be such poverty here that individuals existed who
could not afford a scripto? The letter didn't read like any that had
ever been printed in the column--at least none that had been picked up
in the Fizbus edition:

* * * * *

_New York_

_Dear Senbot Drosmig:_

_I am a subaltern clerk in the shipping department of the FizbEarth
Trading Company, Inc. Although I have held this post for only three
months, I have already won the respect and esteem of my superiors
through my diligence and good character. My habits are exemplary: I
do not gamble, sing, or take caffeine._

_Earlier today, while engaged in evening meditation at my modest
apartments, I was aroused by a peremptory knock at the door. I
flung it open. A native stood there with a small case in his hand._

_"Is the house on fire?" I asked, wondering which of my few humble
possessions I should rescue first._

_"No," he said. "I would like to interest you in some brushes."_

_"Are the offices of the FizbEarth Trading Company, Inc., on
fire?"_

_"Not to my knowledge," he replied, opening his case. "Now I have
here a very nice hairbrush--"_

_I wanted to give him every chance. "Have you come to tell me of
any disaster relative to the FizbEarth Trading Company, to myself,
or to anyone or anything else with whom or with which I am
connected?"_

_"Why, no," he said. "I have come to sell you brushes. Now here is
a little number I know you'll like. My company developed it with
you folks specially in mind. It's--"_

_"Do you know, sir, that you have wantonly interrupted me in the
midst of my meditations, which constitutes an established act of
privacy violation?"_

_"Is that a fact? Now this little item is particularly designed for
brushing the wings--"_

_At that point, I knocked him down and punched him into
insensibility with my feet. Then I summoned the police. To my
surprise, they arrested me instead of him._

_I am writing this letter fr